Once upon a time

It's been five months since I've started down this path that I now find myself on. If I step back and look at things I wonder how on earth did I get here, and how on earth did that become this. It's amazing the shift that has occurred in this relationship that I am in. The night I met my guy, I had absolutely no romantic interest in him. I found talking to him interesting, his life experiences, but that was where it ended. Yet, at the end of the night, I found myself in an awkward place. Him asking me for my number, and me not at all inclined to provide it. This is where the problem lies. I felt exceedingly guilty for telling him no, so always aiming to please, I told my friend (whose house we met at) that he could give him my number. So a couple of weeks later, precisely mid-move into my first house, he called. I truly was busy, completely preoccupied, and above all still not interested. But fearing the abuse of our mutual friend, I returned his call... several days later. To the unbiased outsider, it appeared that I was playing hard to get. That notoriously female role that I don't at all subscribe to. No, I was not playing hard to get. I still was not convinced that this was anything worth pursuing, but I agreed to meet him for drinks anyway. That night I became more and more convinced that he had no romantic interest in me. What guy discusses the people that he is dating while on a date? That was a first for me, and I was completely ready to kiss this one goodbye. But as we were heading out to the car, he did something that I still remember vividly. He grabbed me around the waist, pulled me towards him, and kissed me. At that moment, my eyes were opened.